When You've Had a Bad Day...

...don't pig out.

And I'm sorry I did. With that carton of chocolate milk...and that deliciously irresistable homemade macaroni and cheese...and the two dates I snuck in after that. 

I haven't emotionally ate in a very long time so I suppose you can tell that today was just not my day. Why am I sugar(yum!)coating it? 

My day sucked.

First, I woke up late. You can imagine all the scrambling around the house that followed.

Then, I got stuck in the most annoying traffic jam ever.

Halfway through my 9am class, I got my period and it was this close for it to show for all to see. My energy levels started to drain because of this.

Then I received a rejection after gathering whatever ounce of courage I had. Though not of anybody's fault, it was the way it was presented that bothered me. By close proximity, it was (unawarely) rubbed in. But I suppose hormones were just making me all the more sensitive.

Lunch. Still can't bring myself to subject my tastebuds to organic food despite having really looked forward to trying the organic food restaurant near my workplace. I settled for curry mee, totally forgetting about my sore throat.

Next class. Power levels dwindled by then. It happened to be a particularly exhausting class, despite all the planning I did for it beforehand. Can you imagine my energy going *zap!* *zap!* *zap!* ? Involved a lot of squatting, not something that goes well with cramps.

It was raining during dinnertime, although that didn't make the day worse as I had already gotten used to it raining everyday. It started out as a nice dinner between colleagues when a fourth one joined us, imho, totally ruining it for me as I was not fond of her. Or maybe just rather intimidated. Or both.

More bad news came. Not chosen...and I couldn't figure out why. Not that I'd ask. I am somewhat surprised at my reaction towards this because I haven't been looking forward to being picked nor having bothered about this event at all...but ever since my leave to go to Italy got rejected, I had started looking forward to it a little so it would take my mind off things. Plus, it looked interesting.

But I didn't get it and I am disappointed.

Last class of the day was particularly easy to handle thank goodness, but I was drained emotionally, physically and well, something else (if you can guess...). I wished I had given it my all as I normally did for this class as I have had trouble with this class in the past in giving and receiving respect on so many levels. 

The kids had remembered my birthday and wished me happy birthday and brought a present.

But I was just so...zapped that I could barely force an enthusiastic smile for them. Plus, my throat was acting up from the curry I foolishly ate.

I guess my hormones is doing a lot of the talking for this post. I know I'd get over it and there's always another chance next year...I don't think I've gone so far off the cliff of hope. 

I know I've got paranoid issues. I know I've got self-confidence issues. I know I'm quite retarded at doing anything socially.

But things are starting to become how they've always been...in school and in uni.

I'm being overlooked.